Writings

Topical Jokes Feb #2


February 12th, 2012

During the Super Bowl half-time show, rapper M.I.A. flipped her middle-finger to the camera. Convincing millions of viewers that when you ridicule a person’s costume on TV, they might hear you.

After the Patriots lost the Super Bowl Sunday, Tom Brady’s wife Gisele Bundchen criticized her husband’s teammates for dropping too many passes. Now that she’s so outspoken, she plans to model for new lingerie designer “Victoria’s Gossip”.

A group of New York Giants fans on Tuesday sent more than 900 Butterfinger candy bars to Boston’s Copley Square with a note thanking Patriots receiver Wes Welker for dropping a key pass that helped the Giants win. Which may explain the recent delivery to New York of 900 boxes of Massengill.

In an interview this week Daniel Radcliffe admitted that in the past he has slept with Harry Potter groupies. Good news, ladies, because once you go muggle…

The Bronx Zoo is offering a Valentine’s Day promotion in which for 10 dollars people can name one of its 58,000 hissing cockroaches. Because there are only so many times the zookeeper can use the name of his ex-wife.

Both NBC and the NFL on Monday apologized for rapper M.I.A. sticking out her middle figure during the Super Bowl halftime show. No word from M.I.A. because, well, she’s M.I.A.

In honor of the New York Giants Super Bowl victory, New York City Tuesday held a parade for them down the Canyon of Heroes. Not present at the parade…actual heroes.

After pit bull owners complained this week, McDonald’s pulled an ad that said eating their new Chicken McBites was less risky than petting a pit bull. Surprisingly okay with the ad, however…chicken owners.

San Francisco’s airport has now opened a room just for passengers to practice yoga. But they strongly suggest when you go through security, you should not show off the downward-dog.

The creator of the Red Hots atomic fireball candy died this week at the age of 93. In lieu of flowers, the family continues to ask for a glass of water.

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